Breaking the Negative Cycle on a Monday Morning

What could be better on a Monday morning than breaking your own negative cycle?

I woke up this morning, as usual, at the crack of dawn. I felt grateful for many things and chose three to focus on. However, as I sipped my morning coffee, I noticed an inexplicable low mood. "It feels like anxiety. But why?"

Emotions Are a Choice – Here’s How You Can Influence Them

In recent years, there has been a lot of discussion about the importance of understanding our own backgrounds to grasp how we've ended up in our current state. Often, that state has been burnout, depression, anxiety disorder, or some other symptom of increasing mental strain. I, too, have experienced burnout and analyzed the reasons from my past that led me there. My work situation has changed significantly, and so have my habits.

These days, I don’t shy away from negative emotions but instead ask them why they appear. Naturally, I don’t enjoy feeling down. It makes me sluggish, low-spirited, and as if the world is off track. That’s why I want to clear these emotions as quickly as possible.

This morning, however, I couldn’t pinpoint a direct reason why. There were no triggers, I had slept well, I had only engaged in positive conversations, and I love my life and my morning coffee. So, it was genuinely interesting to sit with the feeling and let it reveal its origins to me.

Why You Should Question Your Negative Feelings

Once I identified the root cause of my emotions, I was able to disprove it and let go of the negativity. I found the experience so important that I decided to write about it.

Emotional Reactions Last Only 90 Seconds – Learn to Let Go

First, I want to remind you that emotions are a choice. A physiological emotional reaction lasts about 90 seconds in the body—after that, it’s up to you. When I first heard this, I started observing my own emotional reactions, and I can no longer deny its truth. The first couple of minutes are automatic, but after that, I can decide whether to hold onto the reaction or let it go.

Where Do Negative Feelings Come From? Use the “Why” Method

Second, I ask myself why this emotion appeared. I do this for positive emotions as well when I don’t recognize their origin. However, I mainly process negative emotions. I act like a curious child, constantly asking “Why? Why? Why?” until I reach a core reason.

When I started this practice, I quickly realized that in 90% of cases, the issue wasn’t what I initially thought. The real root causes were often deeper—sometimes even absurd. Many times, I’ve ended up laughing at my own reactions because they were based on outdated childhood beliefs that no longer hold true in my life. Yet, my emotional responses had remained the same because I had never worked to change them.

Breaking Old Thought Patterns and Creating New Ones

The Power of Change: Rewriting Your Inner Narrative

Third, I challenge my emotional beliefs and create new ones. Many emotional patterns trace back to childhood or adolescence. As an adult, it’s surprisingly easy to tell yourself new, empowering stories.

Instead of labeling myself as “lazy and a failure” after a weekend off, I now see myself as energized, full of love, and a success.

So, to start this new week, I challenge you to be curious. When an emotional reaction arises, don’t push it aside immediately or assume you know where it came from. Instead, try being curious and ask yourself “Why?” until you can’t find any more answers.

Embracing Curiosity for the New Week Ahead

Let’s grow in emotional awareness together. 💖